“Bless me father for I have sinned,
It’s been almost two weeks since my last confession.”
I could put the extended gap in blog posts down to the man flu I had for most of the last ten days, but that wouldn’t be entirely correct. In reality it had more to do with the little bounce back I had when I jumped on the scales last week at my second weekly weigh-in.
After a fantastic first week dropping six pounds I found myself looking at a “+” on week 2. It might only have been a single pound of weight gain, but it’s still difficult to take after a week spent watching my food intake and feeling guilty about my chocolate dreams. I knew where I’d let myself down though, falling off the wagon one day and scoffing an entire bag of sweets along with a greasy fast food meal certainly didn’t help matters.
This time around I was a lot more disciplined and not only reached the half stone mark, I smashed through and set myself well on the way to the next half stone too. A weekly loss of 4 1/2 pounds brought my entire total to 9 1/2 after just three weeks.
It can be difficult to talk about the little knock backs we get in life, our pride, a perceived shame in failing, not being good enough and needing assistance is something that can actually hamper our efforts to pick ourselves up and go fighting again.
There are so many cliches including Yoda’s “Do or do not. there is no try.”, “You learn more in defeat than victory.” and virtually every sentence ever uttered by Sylvester Stallone in Rocky. But they are cliches for a very specific reason, they all ring true.
The easiest thing to do when faced with an obstacle, I’ve done it so often with my weight loss efforts over the years. One or two knock backs and I’m throwing in the towel. This time around I can’t afford to do that, it’s too serious now. Although I don’t have any particular health issues I’m only too aware that if I fail to shift the weight now in my thirties, my chances aren’t higher as I get older.
I know that at my size the chances of heart trouble, diabetes and breathing issues amongst other ailments just gets higher and higher with every passing year. That’s before you even consider the mental health side of things with self esteem, anxiety and even eating disorders all occupying that head space.
What’s most important for me in this situation is realising that if someone like me, who’s openly and willingly shared very private and personal information about myself in the public domain, can struggle to talk about my weight loss failures, how can someone who’s not as comfortable sharing personal information do that.
Let’s face it, it’s not as if weight is a hidden issue. Put on a few pounds and I’ll guarantee your mother or grandmother will let you know, probably in the most inappropriate time and place too, but people can see the issue as it develops. If your clothes are getting a little bit tight or worse, you haven’t gotten a pair of trousers that you can actually close at all, maybe it’s time to ask for help.
I’m so glad I persevered and got excellent results after last week’s set back, life isn’t all about rolling downhill, sometimes you have to get over those little rises to get back to the fun stuff on the other side.